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Reality Check 2.0

September 16, 2009

My bad conscience, more commonly referred to as reality, just made its annual call to say hello and laugh about my utter inability to adapt and arrange myself with the world. As you may have noticed reading some of my previous posts, for large chunks of my life I have been on a head-over-heels run away from everything regular towards nothing in particular. Judging much without knowing that much. Blissfully clouded in dream worlds that God Himself hardly could come up with (He doesn’t have much of an imagination, the poor guy ;)). How easy to indulge in your own little endlessly entertaining playgrounds and convince yourself there are no obligations waiting outside the door. On principle, I have been practicing a policy of strict negation towards any duty in a life I claim to certainly not have chosen – now why should this be my problem, apes? Evaporate, someone else will take care of it! I don’t need your crap anyway, I’m too good for you. (I know, it’s sad.)

realitycheckThat’s where the term “artistic escapism”, slightly ironically, fits into my CV just splendidly, while responsible people probably will argue it is simply cheap. Since as long as there is no such thing invented as one’s personal self-sustaining life support system, we should, for once, in all sophistication rise to the occasion and engage in the fact that we are all forced to interact with each other in some way at some point. Even in Alaska, as much as I hate to admit it. Idealistically I’d like to think that NOTHING affects me, that I am free to disdain all of you and all the stupid things you do, which is of course a big fat denial of humanity and nature itself: a certain interdependence. Ergo, please accept: Staying and fighting is the only motherfucking option, girl.

So yes, I have some serious nonexistent anti-issues regarding politics, people and life plans, but I know it and think I will do my best to make a big production out of it after all. Because come on, I really wouldn’t want to deprive mankind of my ingenious help, you see :D. Not because I can, but because I must – I am ethically obliged to do so. (Wait, what was that? Some major *BLAH*? Guess we’re approaching politics now. Nice!)

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